Fantasy Annoyance: A Shortage of Good Luck (A narrative of the most frustating fantasy football season imaginable)

NOTE - This is written after the conclusion of the regular season for my league, which seems a week early to any fantasy players reading. We decided to have the playoffs take place weeks 13-16, because so many players are rested in week 17. The top four of eight teams make it. Also, if you're new to fantasy football, you might think I'm way to into it. But once you get into it, you get hooked into the prospect of "managing a team," so to say. If you play I'm sure you understand... So here goes.

I've had better years playing fantasy football. My result this year is a perfect illustration of why this popular American hobby can be so frustrating to so many of us.

At the time, my draft seemingly went extraordinarily well. If this was 2010 my team would have run away with the crown. It seemed deep and loaded full of star power. Looking back, I can see where it started to go entirely wrong. In an eight team league, these were my drafted players:

Round 1, 5th: LeSean McCoy, Phi RB
Round 2, 12th: Andre Johnson, Hou WR
Round 3, 21st: Michael Turner, Atl RB
Round 4, 28th: Peyton Manning, Ind QB
Round 5, 37th: Hakeem Nicks, NYG WR
Round 6, 44th: DeAngelo Williams, Car RB
Round 7, 53rd: Brandon Lloyd, Den WR
Round 8, 60th: Dez Bryant, Dal WR
Round 9, 69th: LeGarrette Blount, TB RB
Round 10, 76th: Mike Williams, TB WR
Round 11, 85th: Shonn Greene, NYJ RB
Round 12, 92nd: Kellen Winslow, TB TE
Round 13, 101st: Falcons D/ST
Round 14, 108th: Tim Hightower, Wsh RB
Round 15, 117th: Eli Manning, NYG QB
Round 16, 124th: Rob Bironas, Ten K

Well, my second and fourth round picks didn't turn out to be the greatest. The draft was before there was much of a risk of taking Peyton Manning. It took place when reports were beginning to surface that he might miss the first week of preseason, but there was nothing to worry about. Believe it or not, losing Manning didn't really hurt me, because of the the waiver wire. Not having Andre Johnson did, though...

LeSean McCoy was definitely playing for me this season, and anyone else who owned him. Turner the Burner was the best RB2 anyone could have. Nicks underachieved in my mind; I thought he would blow up and approach 1500 yards on the year, but my expectations proved unrealistic. Carolina's running scheme turned DeAngelo Williams into a major bust. I can't say I wasn't expecting it, but with his huge payday I thought it would be a little better.

All in all though, the draft still wasn't half bad. It would appear I should be able to make my league's playoffs despite the injuries to Manning and Johnson. After all, injuries and busts occur in almost every fantasy player's draft. Which is where the waiver wire and trading come into play.

Yet despite making 24 acquisitions and a pair of major trades, I was still left out of the playoffs in the most frustrating fashion imaginable. I wasn't the team at the bottom of the standings; otherwise I would just suck it up and not write a blog post complaining about the result like I am now. All good fortune turned against me, as I will explain.

It all started in week one, when I sat in front of my computer for five minutes deciding on whether to start Tim Hightower, Mike Williams, Dez Bryant, or DeAngelo Williams in my flex spot. I ultimately selected DeAngelo, who put up a measly three points in a matchup I went on to lose by just five points. Had I gone with any of the other three guys, I would have won. This is how the rest of my season would go.

After week one I made the move that almost saved my season and chance at the $60 the eventual winner will get. Matthew Stafford was sitting in the free agent pool, and after one week I had already had enough of starting Eli Manning. I also let go of the Falcons D in favor of the Lions', and made a kicker change as well. In week two, Stafford, McCoy, Turner, and the Lions D all put up 20+ points en route to a 126-102 win, and I assumed I was good to go. Similar to after the draft, I was already in everyone's faces about how I was going to roll in the cash.

Following week two I was sick of Eli altogether, and I decided to take a chance on the sure-to-be-bust Cam Newton to back up Stafford. Dustin Keller also joined my team until he fell off a few weeks later.

Week four dropped me to 2-2, as the guy I played got 45 points from Aaron Rodgers and a freak 32-point performance from the Ravens D. I wasn't worried.

My team put up a collective dud in week five as I fell to the worst team in the league, 89-78. Even so, his team was so bad that 78 still should have gotten me a win.

I decided I needed to go something. I felt happy with Stafford at QB but knew I needed to change things up a bit if I had any hopes of winning the league. So Dez Bryant and, call me an idiot, Cam Newton were traded for Matt Forte to one of the top teams in the league. The trade seemed like it would help both teams tremendously; he had Ryan Fitzpatrick starting at QB and could use an upgrade while I was riding Stafford's 25 point performances with Newton on the bench. I was more worried about Bryant, who never did break out later on as I feared he would. Forte slowed down soon after the trade, but I loved being able to start McCoy, Turner, and Forte: easily the best running back trifecta in my league.

I worked the waiver wire magic again around the same time, picking up Victor Cruz, a guy no one had heard of who had just ripped off a few big performances. But in week six, Cruz only put up one point, and I decided to try to trade him while I could, thinking his few big weeks were just a stroke of luck.
It took me awhile but I finally convinced another owner to take in Cruz and Shonn Greene for DeSean Jackson. Along with that trade went my season, as you know what happened with those two receivers.

After week ten, though, I was sitting at 6-4 and assuming I was a shoe-in for the playoffs. I'd picked up Tony Gonzalez and DeMarco Murray, both of whom put up a lot of points. Gonzalez became my starting tight end for the second half of the season; Murray I hoped to trade but it never happened. A few weeks ago I grabbed the Texans' D, as the Lions' was falling apart. I was optimistic about my chances of being able to keep the $60 stored in my bedroom ($20 went to second place).

In week eleven I lost, falling to 6-5, in part because of stupid decisions on who to start. I won't bore you with the details, as I've probably been doing to those of you still reading.

I found myself going into the final week of my league's regular season not worried at all: I was playing a 3-8 team and currently in third place.

The situation was three 6-5 teams, one of which was mine, fighting for the final two playoff spots. All I needed to do was win against a lousy team. Even if I lost, I would still get in with a loss by either of the other two 6-5 teams, as I held the scoring tiebreak with the 2nd-most cumulative points in the league.

At this point, my roster:

QB - Matthew Stafford, Det
RB - LeSean McCoy, Phi
RB - Matt Forte, Chi
RB/WR - Michael Turner, Atl
WR - Hakeem Nicks, NYG
WR - DeSean Jackson, Phi
TE - Tony Gonzalez, Atl
D/ST - Texans D/ST
K - Mason Crosby, GB

Andre Johnson, Hou WR
Brandon Lloyd, StL WR
LeGarrette Blount, TB RB
Eli Manning, NYG QB
DeMarco Murray, Dal RB
Plaxico Burress, NYJ WR
Antonio Brown, Pit WR

Heading into the Monday night game, I needed Hakeem Nicks to put up 23 points, or Victor Cruz to not record a point and Nicks to put up 30. (Yes, I calculated this, don't worry about the scenario so much. Basically, what I am trying to say was I am finished.)

DeSean Jackson, I hate you.

Yes, his two touchdown drops did, in fact, cost me my fantasy season I'd worked far too hard on.

Wait'll next year, everyone. I'll be back.....hopefully with a least a tiny stroke of luck.